At 22:00 hours on Monday evening, an alien spaceship landed on a Seattle poet's roof. A little green man crawled into her bedroom window, stealing a proof copy of The Little Office of the Immaculate Conception off her desk. When asked why he was absconding with a copy of her as-yet unpublished book, said alien replied "because she assumes space aliens know nothing about human beings and planet Earth, which is absolute poppycock. We know infinitely more about you French fry and orgami-obsessed weirdos than you will ever know about us!" The poet, though we left her many haiku-inspired text messages, declined comment.